Having a child with special needs affects the whole family.

Having a child with additional needs changes a family.  I think you become more insular as no one can truly understand how much your life has changed.  We are not the same people, same couple, same family as we were before our special boy, Hugh, was born.  Our priorities have changed.  Our needs have changed.  Hell, even our political views have changed.  It’s not all bad though.  Yes, I am beginning to feel isolated from even my closest friends, but in turn, we have grown stronger as a couple, talk more openly and rely on each other more.

My overriding concern has always been though, the effect having a brother with special needs will have on my eldest son, Sean.  He is nearly three and I worry almost as much about his future as I do about his younger brother’s. Will he get bullied for having a brother that is so ‘different’?  Will he feel neglected because his brother demands so much care and attention?  Will he be embarrassed by a brother that can’t walk or talk?  Will he be jealous…

Meet The Family


"Mmmm, must be wine-o'clock again!"

Me: I'm Little Mama Murphy- short-arsed, bespectacled, with hair that has varied through the years from long, curly and red to short straight and blonde and anything in-between (including a disastrous pink accident and a dodgy black ‘goth’ look!). Rather fond of a glass of wine or three.

Married to: Mr. M - sturdy, dependable and tall (I come up to just about his shoulders).

Mum to (or Mama as Sean used to call me, hence the name): 
Sean - a cheeky, chatterbox and a wonderful kind and caring big brother to... 
Little Hugh- my beautiful smiley boy with no end of complicated medical difficulties, keeping all the doctors on their toes, turning his dad and me grey with worry and the reason I started this blog.

Mostly this is me, rambling about family life with a ‘medical mystery’, an undiagnosed child, stressing about coming to terms with that (or not as the case may be) and pretty much pouring out all the thoughts and feelings that are bubbling around in my head.  I’m basically using the Internet as free counselling! So far it seems to be working as I haven’t had a nervous breakdown. Yet!

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